Frog Man
My friend Wayne wanted to go to Brazil for a facelift. So one night, we went over to Wayne’s for dinner to get to the bottom of this “facelift in Brazil” thing. He served us cold, gelatinous roast beef and gravy with vegetables, “the way my mama used to make it,” he said. I’m sure his mama served her meals hot. He also made me a rum and coke with whipping cream and strawberries, for god’s sake. The cream was curdling into chunks. John, his son, made a face. John didn’t add much to the conversation. I guess his dislike of Wayne’s girlfriend, Norma, prevents him from becoming too animated or even speaking. Yet, how can people live like that?
We discovered that he really is going, and he is going, primarily, to have his lids lightened. According to him, they are too heavy, so he needs some skin removed. What’s worse is that people tell him he looks like a frog, and he’s tired of it. He will also have his neck done while he is there. He is a 71-year-old man. If he is not happy in his own skin, he should go ahead and cut some off. And why Brazil? Brazil ranks as one of the best countries in the world for “medical tourism”. Why pay more than you have to?
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